Are we enough?

Are we enough?
Photo by Matt Bennett / Unsplash

I don't have a concrete example or a certain source for my thoughts, as my contemplation began belatedly. Before I aspired to accomplish something, before even considering giving up, I never contemplated building something indispensable, something I couldn't abandon.

I once believed I wanted everything, to pursue my desires and achieve them. However, I neglected to draw these aspirations closer to me, to build and create a foundation, a place, a plan, a direction, a focal point, a base to lean on so I wouldn't lose everything. To cling to dreams and desires, yet always wandering aimlessly.

Missing oneself is not ideal, but I'd rather lack spontaneity and moments than forget the reasons for my own absence. Replaying the same scenes in my mind won't make them feel more real or lively.

This realization won't alter my behavior or change my self-creation. But did I ever truly desire, or was it mere hope? I've imagined much, but my values are frozen in a moment that eludes me, no matter where I go.

My greatest dilemma is not knowing how to change the world or how to be useful. Our fundamental role is survival, and even in rejecting life, our bodies strive with singular focus to keep us alive. If survival is paramount, yet we often neglect or harm our own lives. When leaping into the unknown, either we have nothing to lose, or we subconsciously know we will be unharmed. Is it a fault not to have certainty? And is it still a fault if we at least know our direction?

From nothing, connections emerge, underestimating the complexity of human interaction. In the pursuit of connection, we talk about ourselves, seeking points of relatability. But each truth differs; no one lives the same life as another.

To be influenced is natural, for true sharing occurs not when we think we're expressing free-willed, conscious ideas, but when we're open to the influence of others, enriching our thoughts and theirs.

Everything that exists is already in sight, like branches breaking as trees age. Each new tree grows naturally, venturing into the unknown because it's in its nature. We encounter more branches in life than we cultivate, spending more time breaking them than observing their growth. The challenge is finding our place. We contribute to life, but what do we offer it in return? Accepting that there are countless paths to choose, but how distinct are they truly?